Thursday, February 16, 2006
the lowest point
"GEEZ, Kagura! You made everybody so worried! What came over you? Why the hell did you do such a thing? Tell me. Why did you run away from home?" I found Kagura-san sitting on a swing by the park. "Come! Let's go! It's freezing out here." The air was stuffy -- too heavy for me to carry. I couldn't bare to be in the picture anymore. I just had to make a move to get it over with. If it's because of his eyes or his lips or his great body, it's not love... it's lust. If it's because of his intelligence or insight about life, it's not love... it's admiration. If it's because he cries everytime you try to leave, it's not love... it's pity. If it's because he makes you forget to study and sleep, it's not love... it's infatuation. Love is when you do not know why you seem to be attracted to a preson. Love has its reason. And that reason is unknown. I explained Kagura-san about all of these if and thats hoping that she would understand. "Kyo... If you're asking me that I mistook the reason of why I love you, you're wrong. I love you." Those were sweet words but... "Admiration, pity, infatuation and even lust... it's because of all of them and more why I love you. Right now, I don't even know what this feeling looming inside me." "Let's go, Kagura." I have nothing more to say. "Okay." Before I knew it, we were already in front of Shigure's steps.
"I... knew it..." Soft words came out.
"Kagura. Come on." I offered my hand to her. Well, I figure that she would be easier to convince if I offer my hand. It was very cold and I wanted to go back very quickly.
We were very silent. All sorts of feelings took swept the atmosphere. The swing. The park. I was trapped in a void."Kyo... Maybe you could just leave me here for a while." I barely heard her. Fortunately, I've got cat ears.
"Baka! You're coming with me! Come on, let's go! They're waiting!" It's getting very late. "Kagura... Do you know the true meaning of love?" Is she really in love with me? I am so clueless right now.
broke the ice at 1:33 AM
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
february marches on
It's almost two weeks since I've heard of Kagura's voice."BAKA!" Why the hell am I so concerned?
It's not like I like Kagura. I don't like Kagura. I don't like her. But... why do I hate her so much? Am I in the position to hate her? Do I please to forget her?
My reason: whenever she's here, a lot of bad things happen to me. Then: How come I'm not feeling right for the moment?"Oh no..." this is not right.
I have generalized the situation too soon. There are some times that bad things do happen whenever I'm with her, but it's not because she wanted those things to happen, right? Or maybe I deserve to be dropped in the face. However, isn't it naive for me to beg the reason: just because she beats me up it's all the reason to hate her."It's kid stuff I tell you." So why do I hate her again?
She might've broken a couple of bones, shred a couple of muscles and that's it?! What about my emotions, my well being? Did she even lift a finger to hurt my feelings?!
Physically she hurted me, but not emotionally or any other. I could take physical damage but she didn't hurt my feelings or emotion. "How cruel!" I am cruel as cruel I would ever be.
Yuki is right. I am stupid. I am a fool for not seeing how I treated her. I am a fool for every terrible things I've said to her!
All these years... if my only reason to hate her is because I don't like to be physicall hurt, maybe I should suffer more."Sorry to disturb you, Kyo-kun. But, Kagura's mom just called. She asked me if Kagura was staying over here. I told her mom that she didn't pass by. Apparently, she hasn't come him since yesterday."
"HUH?!" What's going on?
broke the ice at 11:52 PM
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
craving
"Daijobou desu ka?" asked Tohru-kun
Sigh. Kagura-san, I'm waiting for my chocolate. It is, after all, Valentine's day.
"Aah... OF COURSE! I've never felt better." I wish
broke the ice at 10:48 PM
Friday, February 10, 2006
come back at me hard
I don't know what to do anymore. There's this girl who really loves me, but I can't love her back. There's a case of one sided love before my eyes. Whatever I do, she keeps coming back. I've done some pretty ugly things on her, everybody thinks I'm obnoxious. When will this end. I'm really depressed too. I can almost imagine what she'd feel after realizing my hateful manner towards her. Why? Normally, you would avoid me. You would keep your distance, right? You would get away. Your Kyo-kun hasn't got any positive feature. What made you so concerned about me? The tears would fall.
"I've got something in my eye..." Kagura-san, arigato.
broke the ice at 12:35 AM
Kyo is the cat or outcast of the zodiac. Whenever he embraces a
person of the opposite gender, he transforms into a cat.
Kyo is really sensitive, so it is easy to get him pissed off.
Whenever he loses his temper, he says mean things without thinking about what he's saying.Kyo is also really competitive with Yuki. He will get in a fist fight or argument, but Yuki always beats him or has a comeback. He even has to live with Yuki.
Both of them have a crush on their housekeeper, Tohru, which leads to a lot of problems in their house.
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